Sunday, December 13, 2009

How to raise a son of this man

Now the question of education of this man becomes particularly relevant. After all, how we sometimes annoying hesitation own husbands, the inability to take action, or desire to hide from problems.



But all the principles of behavior are laid in childhood! From the earliest years of life, it is important to teach the boy to be brave and resolute, so that in time it has turned out a worthy representative of the male.



How to raise a boy a man - tells a woman's site sympaty.net.


What should I do in the education of the boys THESE MEN

1. Let the example will be men - real and imaginary
When the education of the boy's real man, the ideal would be to surround the child as possible a large number of men. This may be my father, uncle, grandfather, friends. This is especially important if the child has no father, and he brought up a single mother. In this case, it will be equal to men in their behavior.



Pay attention to how the pope communicate with their kids. What they allow, but what is firmly denied. Unlike mothers, they allow the boys a lot, do not say "there do not go, do not go here. On the contrary, even encourage curiosity sons and help overcome difficulties.



Of course, this is just an example of male behavior. Even now not all of the pope, such as improper upbringing affects single mothers and strong women who are accustomed to take everything into their hands.



Educate the boy out of this man must also be based on the books and films, where there are heroes. Only careful when choosing your home collection! Let his heroes are knights, musketeers and other characters who struggle against injustice. Modern fighters and comics are unlikely to serve as a good example.



2. Let the boy feel like a man
Child 3-4 years old boys buy more toys. These toys should not be bright. Choose calm tones, because the brightness and diversity - the fate of girls.



To a boy was a real man, its already in 5-6 years can bring to any case, for example, give a hand hammer to help the pope to hammer a nail. To teach something tinkering. Of course, under the supervision of adults. The sooner the boy will help someone out of adult men, the better. It will raise his self-esteem, the boy feels their necessity and involvement in the "male" society.



In the senior preschool and school-age boy should be brought up to respect girls: girls skip forward, to help the girls to wear heavy bags.



In adolescence, better give her son more freedom. Suppose he chooses friends and take their own decisions. So he quickly learns to be responsible for their actions and become independent.



3. Praise him
Each time a child overcome any obstacle, you should praise him, emphasizing his masculinity: "Well done! Here's how come the real men! "



Generally, you should frequently praise the boy, saying how he is strong, courageous, patient, courageous and resolute. Even when the boy only one year old, he was on the subconscious level to understand what he is courageous.



4. Be a woman!
And of course, as my mother would not want to be strong, but in the education of the boy's a real man let him not forget that it is, first of all, just a woman.



Let her son sees a kindly, gentle, loving, sometimes weak. So the boy learns to have compassion and sympathy, to be frank, to support mom and help that will help him get as a strong, confident men capable of standing up for themselves and to protect the woman.



THINGS TO AVOID IN THE EDUCATION OF BOY MEN

1. Do not suppress his initiative
When the education of the boy's a real man would be wrong to suppress boyish initiatives.



Now you can often hear the voices rude mothers who literally yelling at their children: "Where have you climbed, you stupid ??!!! Who said, do not go there! Needless to howl, you're to blame! Where have you climbed? What kind of enfant terrible! "



It is clear that women worry, as if the child what had happened. But sometimes they do not show the boy's initiative, to enjoy childhood. Primarily due to the fact that it is inconvenient to Mama. After all, that the boy could not repel the abuser, to overcome difficulties and to understand why something is dangerous or that action - with him to talk! It is necessary to explain! And how convenient to sit on the bench and not be worn with the child, instead of cooperative games - chat with buddies, and if the child is naughty, just to shout or threaten. That brings up my mother and child for themselves, for their convenience, drowning in a child masculinity and independence. So grow up and not real men - weaklings yes Vitelloni.



2. Do not spoil it too
Also, in the upbringing of the boy's real man, too wrong to spoil the child and to adhere to the views of "Let my son will be something that was not me. Such parents tend themselves to solve all of the child, to deprive him of the individuality and independent living.



3. Not a son "system"
No need to raise a child "system", as some mothers. To feed, they will be strictly by the hour, put down in one and the same time, play some games. Step right, step left - "shooting". Crying child is ignored and the whims harshly suppressed. This boy grows up withdrawn, indecisive, and sometimes hates the whole female sex.



And in conclusion, I would like to say: Mom, follow the golden mean! And in the upbringing of the boy's real man, listen to our advice!
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Friday, December 11, 2009

Sadness after sex. Why this happens?

Today more men and women are beginning to complain that after sex feel overwhelmed and frustrated. It is not that all the financial crisis saps and flu - has always been, but was taken to keep silent.


After sex, instead of euphoria and joy I feel emptiness and sadness.

Real Stories

"After sex, instead of euphoria and joy I feel emptiness and sadness. And it's not that I am dissatisfied with the way sex took place, or those with whom it happened. Orgasm can be enchanting, but since it can be rolled forward to me a sense of hopelessness "- is divided into 27-year-old Irina, located in the search for a permanent men.



On these sensations says Catherine, three years of staying in a happy marriage. She admits that after sex with her beloved husband often feels lethargic and depressed: "Once we are divorced from each other, my mood drops to zero and can stay there for a few days."



Lack of logic

From sex we are waiting for the relaxation and happiness. Indeed he is and is programmed, because in the process of making love hormones of happiness, and there is complete muscle relaxation. And this is only from the standpoint of physiology. And there are psycho-emotional component: during sex, we feel that incredibly close and candid with another man, who also was called to meet us. So what's the matter? Why, after such a powerful antidepressant classes advancing emotional torment? The answer lies not in psychology, as it may seem at first glance, but in physiology.



Modernity at anything

Nature saved the surprise for us. Sexologists already nicknamed him poscoital blues ( «grief after close"). But this is not an invention of our time - posleorgazmennye anxiety and sadness has plagued the ancient Greeks. Proof of this can serve as a statement of the ancient physician Galen: "After intercourse all animals are sad except roosters and women." Perhaps the Greek was not a great connoisseur of the fair sex, just do not take into account their mental torment.

Mysteries of Nature



Compare this with a hangover can be after a hectic and incredibly fun party.
The fact that orgasm is a strong positive changes in the body, but after the climax has passed, the body is forced to return to its normal state. And in contrast to the euphoria, just tested, the rate begins to seem inadequate.
At the chemical level

During orgasm activated brain regions involved in the development of dopamine. This is a hormone released when receiving pleasure, for example, he actively carried out at a time when we feel in love. Such a conclusion was a biologist Gert Holstege. Also during orgasm is significantly reduced activity of the amygdala, which is responsible for the feeling of fear. Plus, at the moment of highest pleasure markedly increased the pain threshold. According to some reports, mild stimulation of the G-spot is able to reduce sensitivity to pain almost half.



And after a storm of happiness and joy subside, increased activity of the amygdala, responsible for fear, we find ourselves face to face with progressive concern. Compare this with a hangover can be after a hectic and incredibly fun party.



Case head

So do not worry if after sex you suddenly feel upset. It's not that you chose not to and that he did not do so, but only in your physiology. Just some people carry "hormonal" storm safely, and some - painfully. And if you belong to the second category, do not rush to complain about girlfriends or doctors. Just wait, when your precious brain reconstructed from one state to another.
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Monday, November 23, 2009

Sex during pregnancy. Yes or no?

Many pregnant women turn to doctors to the question, is it safe to have sex during pregnancy. Doctors usually inclined to the view that pregnant women can be ...



... to have sex, and it is safe. During orgasm, or stimulation of erogenous zones on her breast, uterine contractions may occur, but that there is nothing terrible, and should not be afraid of miscarriage. However, if uterine contractions did not stop after a few minutes and there will be blood separation, should certainly appeal to watching you doctor.

There is a positive moment in sex during pregnancy: through physiological changes during pregnancy (increased blood flow to the pelvis, is expanding uterus, vagina, clitoris increases), women are able to achieve a more "qualitative", bright orgasm and feel more pleasure. Sex is also able to raise a woman's libido.

Many people ask about safe sex late in pregnancy. And even in this case, doctors say yes (if the pregnant woman is no amount of bleeding, there is no risk of premature damage to the membranes, there is no discharge, the partner is not serious genital infections (eg, herpes, etc.), a woman in excellent health feels).

However, many men are afraid of having sex with his wife in late pregnancy. They are afraid of somehow harm the health of his wife and child, are experiencing for them. In this case, both partners can either choose a safe posture, move on to oral pleasure, or even just go to a gentle massage to each other.

Sex for one night: the rules

Sex for one night is associated with a number of pleasant sensations and surprises. How not to spoil the mood? To avoid mistakes, experts advise to adhere to certain rules.



Here are some tips to follow that, you will not spoil the experience.
1. Where to stay overnight?

Women usually housing is cleaner than men. In addition, the sleeping woman's bed with silk sheets and lots of comfortable cushions - the perfect place for sex. But think about the shortcomings that you bring a stranger to his home. After a night of love, it's easier to leave the house a friend, than to man.
2. Safe sex

If you have multiple sexual partners, you better think about remedies. And no matter what your partner, unprotected sex is dangerous!
Keep and regularly screened by a gynecologist, especially if you have multiple sexual partners. And best of all - always keep a condom in her purse.
3. Most important thing - to experiment

Sex for one night - a great opportunity to try some new poses. Discuss with your partner for your erotic fantasies. By cherishing Treat sexual partner preferences. If you do not like something, tactfully tell him about it.
4. Not Fade Away

If you liked sex with this man, do not disappear. You may want to continue the relationship. Do not miss a chance to meet again with this person.

Scariest love there is no beast

Attention and love is never enough. And because each of us in varying degrees are hungry for a close and trusting relationship. But the strange thing: it is necessary only to find such a relationship, they begin to call "allergies", "leading to run away from vicinity. And if a person from something escapes, the action fear? But fear of what?
Again, do not get what you want

Whether we like it or not, it is childish impressions create our first "road map" of love. Couple that we are going to meet, of course, must be beautiful. But that's not all: on the bizarre logic of children, our future partner should give us a portion of love, loss in childhood.

The fact is that even the most caring parents can not answer all our emotional needs. So unconsciously we are waiting for compensation due from the chosen one. For example, a girl is looking for an all-powerful father, who always avoids the trouble and pointed the right direction, and her chosen one is looking for "mother", which understands it to 100% and does not cease to admire them constantly. Find a living creature, which fully complies with these expectations, it is not possible. Therefore, we are beginning to be afraid of disappointment.

This fear may be particularly strong for those who in childhood had a chance of losing a parent - through death or divorce in the family. They seemed to make a decision: "It is better for anyone not tied down, because I could not bear the loss, if I throw." Love is danger, and fear once again get into this situation blocks the development of any deep relationship.

And, finally, the suspicion of the presence in their children's inflated expectations of a partner, we can expect that and it has exactly the same bunch of requirements. It is likely that he wants to see in us a perfect parent and a continuous source of their happiness. And if we do not fulfill these requirements, we simply eat the bones and leave you with just a killer sense of guilt.
Success against love

There is another reason for fear of love: it is a cult success. We are in kindergarten is well understood that important. It is important to win at competitions, occupy the first place, to show their advantages. That is, try to be the best. Exactly the same call family, school and institution. Very easy to make such a scheme on relations with the opposite sex: it is important to win the best of its representatives. This will have to use every conceivable means of compliance with social standards. Such a strategy is good for tineydzherskogo self-assertion, but when a grown man to win such a contest, he risks remain with his victory in a vacuum. At the close relationship the logic of success is hard to reconcile with the logic of love. Precisely, these two logics are in direct collision. We must always choose - whether to be or show a good face. But you can not always hide their weaknesses.

What happens after a period of flirtation and romance, runs counter to the culture of success. Love - then voluntarily agree to an emotional dependence on another, and the culture of success has taught us the value of autonomy. In an intimate relationship "win" those who do not seek to win, but for the "success" is to abandon external standards and accept imperfection. But such a rejection of self-realization is too unfamiliar and therefore scary.

Fear transition

And, finally, when people are considering a joint zhite, find themselves confronted with fears that may seem far-fetched and unfair to the partner. In fact, it is quite legitimate fears connected with the moment of choice - so that we in the new stage to part with some excellent opportunities. We say goodbye with the freedom to live, to anyone without having to account, we are parting with a view to create a useless non-binding novel with a nice man, finally, we refuse to set the daily habits, such as the indiscriminate dispersal of their socks and washing dishes as the disappearance of the net.

Loss of freedom and opportunity scares - and this is a very real fear. But if we are aware of the fear he becomes a conscious choice.

However, today more people are trying to avoid a conscious choice - good, public opinion can not give each other the final promises to "forever". Culture of relations "light" increases the romantic and sexual freedom, but on the other - enables a person to escape from their fear of intimacy, because there is always readily "emergency exit" from the relationship. At one end of the scale - a relationship without pain and consequences, on the other - lack of opportunities to grow, because growth takes place in deep relationships.

Go through the fears

This closeness, a new form of being alone, scared - this is normal. This is a healthy fear of development and growth. It is better to be aware: if there is an opportunity to choose how to live on. Otherwise it is possible for a long time to get stuck between two polar fear: fear of loneliness and pain of love. In any case, the fear - not the best motivator for our lives.

It is to admit that love is terrible, and that these fears are normal. Then, with fears at least you can meet.

In general, all the fears of closeness can be attributed to one of two categories: the fear of rejection ( "I do not want to, leave me") and the fear of absorption ( "I would deny freedom to be controlled, I can not realize themselves"). The first is traditionally considered feminine, the second - a male, but it is too primitive simplification: the same man at different stages of development of relations may experience any of them.

Fear of rejection leads too readily to agree with the other, abandoning himself. If he is aware, it makes learning to love and appreciate themselves. Then you can not be afraid of small signs of rejection in the form of quarrels and complaints: let me unhappy - this is not the end of the world. In the end, even if the loved one is gone, life goes on. When a person is not aware of the fear of absorption, it automatically says "no" and refuse from everything, simply because any cost defend its independence. In fact, he did not have time to think about what he wants, and what not. Recognizes this fear, man is free to say "yes" and "no" more intelligent, as well as another set reasonable limits. Finally, it is clear that love - it is really great is a real risk of real loss. And then you can gradually move from illusion to reality.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Prevalence of chronic prostatitis

The public opinion chronic prostatitis is a very common urological disease of great social importance. In the minds of many men chronic prostatitis is presented as inevitable. Contribute to this publication, indicating that chronic prostatitis affects 40 - 70% of men of reproductive age. Leading world expert on this issue, Nickel JC (1999) suggests that approximately 9% of male population have manifestations of prostatitis and two-thirds of them seek medical help. In general, the problem is not HP is less relevant to men and middle aged and older.
Patients with prostatitis constitute about 8% of all outpatient visits to urologists (Collins MM et al. 1998). This is the most frequent urologic disease profile in men and 50 years and third in frequency - in men older than 50 years (after BPH and prostate cancer). In an average year urologist takes 150-250 prostatitis patients, of whom about 50 were new patients. Patients with chronic prostatitis up to 1% of all visits to general practitioners. On the clinical, social and economic importance of the problem eloquent statistics NIH (1999) that in the United States the number of visits within one year of general practitioners and urologists about HP (1850593) exceeds such index for patients with benign prostatic hyperplasia (1709053) and cancer prostate (887,341).

In assessing the importance of the problem under discussion is necessary to emphasize a clear negative impact of CP on quality of life of patients, which is comparable to that for angina, Crohn's disease and diabetes mellitus (Wenninger K. et al. 1996).

According to the known epidemiological data, up to 90% of cases occurring in abakterialny prostatitis, in which the main complaint of patients is pain. In addition, often, the disease is preceded by nervous stress. However, so far not been established whether it is a cause or consequence prostatodinii. Chronic prostatitis is associated with psycho-vegetative disorders. It is often accompanied by anxiety, anxiety, depression, problems in the intimate sphere (de la Rosette JJ, 1993).
Rx Louisiana

The course of chronic prostatitis

Chronic prostatitis different long and hard over, and in some patients for years, he proceeds without a clear clinical symptoms.
Divided into 3 stages:
I (stage alterativnyh changes)
II (stage of proliferative changes) and III (sclerosis of the prostate gland).
In I (alterativnoy) being most often the beginning of the disease indicates the appearance of pain in the rectum, perineum, lumbar-sacral region, in the testes Fire inguinal areas. At the same time can appear mucous discharge from the urethra, as well as frequent and painful urination, nocturia. Most patients note increased libido, increased frequency of spontaneous erections, decrease the duration of sexual intercourse, possible pain during ejaculation. Depending on the structure of the individual patient's awareness of their illness may impose one or the other mark on the further course of the disease and its complications.
Typically, patients with chronic prostatitis stage II on the background of persistent discomfort in the genital area is deteriorating overall health - drowsiness, weakness, fatigue, decreased libido, erectile dysfunction, dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system: sweating and hyperesthesia, vegetative dystonia.
The emerging psycho-emotional status makes it difficult to contact with the doctor, and sometimes with others, and suppresses his belief in the success of the frequently observed development of neuroses and neurosis-like states, may result in an asthenic syndrome, a syndrome of waiting, overvalued ideas syndrome, a syndrome of obsession, etc.
The clinical picture of disease in stage III acquire infravesical obstruction symptoms, although some patients may present symptoms characteristic of I and II stages of chronic prostatitis.
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Chronic prostatitis and erectile dysfunction

Chronic prostatitis is an infectious and inflammatory diseases of the prostate gland which occurs mostly in young and middle-aged and symptomatic pain syndrome is manifested in various sites, a violation of the act of urination disorders and erectile function.
Erectile function is realized neyrovaskulyatornyh complex processes involving the interaction of the central, peripheral nervous systems, smooth muscle elements of the arteries and trabeculae of the penis. The term "erectile dysfunction" in recent years replacing the widely used practical urologists, the term "impotence" and characterizes the state, which has resulted in failure to achieve and maintain an erection sufficient for sexual activity [NIH Consensus Conference: Impotence, 1993].
Disorders of sexual function observed in chronic prostatitis may manifest disorders of erection, ejaculation and reduced sexual drive (libido). It is believed that sexual dysfunction in patients with chronic prostatitis characterized by phasic development.
Erectile dysfunction, is observed in patients with chronic prostatitis, mainly due to psychogenic or neurotic syndromes. Neurotic symptoms, in turn, are divided into primary, with a direct violation of the sexual function and secondary, with the involvement of this sector in a picture of neurosis.
The prevalence of erectile dysfunction (ED) significantly increases with age. According Karadeniz T. et al. (2003), it is observed in 5% of cases in men younger than 40 years and more than 15% of cases in elderly patients up to 70 years. According to the Massachusetts study of men of different ages, the overall prevalence of ED among men aged 40 to 70 years was 52%.
Other studies of epidemiology of erectile dysfunction confirm its identification in a relatively small (up to 10%) percentage of cases in men aged 18 to 40 years (Kinsey et al., 1988). Thus, it is obvious that the frequency of ED increases progressively with age. Interestingly, these data are comparable with the results of studies Nickel J. C. (1999) - an authoritative expert in the study of chronic prostatitis.
It is noted that erectile dysfunction develops within 15-30% of the total number of patients with chronic prostatitis. The few works that describe the prevalence of erectile dysfunction, depending on the form of chronic prostatitis prove that it is most pronounced and frequent in patients with chronic bacterial prostatitis. Thus, erectile dysfunction may occur as early bacterial inflammation of the prostate, and in the outcome of the disease.
The contemporary literature reflects the view that the main causative factor of erectile dysfunction in patients with chronic prostatitis are violations of mental or neuro-activity. Thus, vaskulogennaya and neurological components, hormonal imbalance, unhealthy lifestyle and alcohol abuse, smoking, consumption of drugs, obesity and physical inactivity - are mostly attributed to the etiological factors of erectile dysfunction in patients aged more or gerontology group.
On the other hand, the detailed functional and neurological examination abakterialnym patients with chronic prostatitis / chronic pelvic pain syndrome, especially the categories of NIH-IIIB, often reveal the presence of neurologically - due to violations of the function of the pelvic floor and lower urinary tract. Therefore, in our opinion, patients with ED associated abakterialnomu chronic prostatitis, it is necessary to take into account the possible presence of underlying neurological disease of the central or peripheral nervous system, which can lead to development of symptoms of dysfunction of the lower urinary tract, pelvic pain and erectile dysfunction.

The most significant therapeutic effect in treating erectile dysfunction in patients with chronic prostatitis observed when using the method of psychosexual and medical therapy. Patients with chronic prostatitis with significant psychological disorders psychosexual therapy can be used as a monotherapy and in combination with other treatments. An interesting fact that psychosexual treatment involving the interaction of sexual partner, gives positive results, as in psychogenic and organic in the ED.
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